Forgiven
"Sadness for the Time lost, Excitement for the Future"
In the summer of 2010, we left our friends’ Provincetown beach house in a huff and a hurry. Our three-year-old son, usually a peaceful warrior, had picked up on the hostile energy, and was punching and kicking. We fled town, along with my decades-old friendship. It’s been sixteen years since we cut ties. I cut ties.
According to my investigation and a quick check with AI, research suggests that people replace roughly half of their dearest friends approximately every seven years. The average American loses about one close friend annually.
I have found this friendship loss theory to be both accurate and distressing. However, when connections return, it is a revelation. Many years have passed by since that Cape Cod altercation, but the connection to my college friend never severed.
It takes one brave person to reach out, to risk rejection, and another to gracefully accept an apology. Nothing is more uplifting than forgiveness, an opportunity to just say yes, which feels so much better than no. The payoff is huge. I celebrate the beauty of the return.
We are finding our way forward without revisiting the past. It feels jubilant to call up the courage to be vulnerable, responsible, mindful, curious, open. I’m very grateful for the second chance. This gives me great hope for healing in this sometimes painfully cruel world.
PS - I’m almost halfway to my fundraising goal for the AAMDS Foundation, thanks to all of you. It’s not too late if you’d like to support this amazing organization by clicking on the link below: